Scientists are overrated: A semi-serious rant

Seriously. What do scientists do every day?

Oh, for sure they've achieved some great things like sending people to the moon, but so what? They fail abysmally at solving the pressing fundamental day-to-day real-world issues, like finding a way to get rid of the disgusting diluted bit at the bottom of the McDonald's Coke cup.

I got my annual flu vaccine recently. The worst part about it for me is not the injection itself, because I've been jabbed so many times I'm more or less immune to the pain (pun totally intended), but the aftermath. You know, the dull pain that flares up when you press the wound site or move the affected limb too vigorously? I get it 10 times worse because I'm so thin the needle practically goes right through to the bone. For more than two weeks after a vaccination, I can't put any pressure on the wound site or there'll be a searing pain. It sucks.

When I was a kid, I hated going for injections. I would scream and cry and beat my tiny fists against my mother's bosom every time I was about to get vaccinated. Once, my mother got vaccinated at the same time as me to try to comfort me, but her clever plan didn't work. I screamed even louder at the hapless doctor because to my reptilian child's brain, not only was he about to inflict grievous harm upon me, he had also had the nerve to hurt my family.

There was hope for the future, though, when news emerged of a new kind of flu vaccine which could be administered orally similar to the polio vaccine. No longer would my mother have to drag me squealing like a pig in a slaughterhouse all the way to the doctor's office. If the flu vaccine became a drop of liquid that I could just drink, there would be no pain and no tears.

Almost two decades later and nothing has changed. We still put dead viruses into vials filled with egg white, and pump the resulting mixture into our bodies by piercing ourselves with sharp implements. You'd think we're still in the medieval era.

Don't get me wrong. I think scientists have their uses. For example, they're making wonderful progress in sequencing the human genome, which will allow other scientists to create cures for deadly diseases such as cancer. But they really need to pull their heads out of the clouds, get their priorities straight, and realise that some of the problems this world is facing demand their immediate attention.

In the meantime, I'll avoid the disgusting diluted bit by requesting for "no ice" at McDonald's.